Hi friends, welcome to September- my birthday month! As always around this time of year, I’ve been reflecting on how I’ve spent the last (insert your best guess at my age) years on this planet. Not with judgement, just as a way to appreciate where I’ve been and get excited about where I’m going.
Looking back, I noticed that my life has been defined by change – I’ve never lived in the same house for more than 7 years, my career path has taken many unpredictable turns, and I’ve dipped my toes into a wide variety of activities and hobbies without ever fully committing to any.
There is only one thing that has been constant throughout the years besides the incredible love and support from my family.
I started journaling when I was 8, right around the time we moved to Miami from Chile. Since then, I have filled over 20 notebooks with thoughts, memories, movie stubs from my first date, cutouts from the Disney World brochure after our first visit, notes I passed back and forth with my 8th grade crush, and the airplane tickets to my first trip to Europe with my sister. I have stopped adding that kind of flare and stuck to just words, but I’m still filling up journals these days.
I never really considered writing to be anything other than a way to connect with myself and clear my mind. Until I realized that blogging was a thing, and that I could maybe get famous by turning my daily practice into something really “productive”.
My first blog was called “In the Middle” because I’m the middle of 3 sisters, and it was a just-for-fun way to figure out how blogging worked. When I started considering the idea of becoming a yoga teacher and maybe opening a studio one day, the blog evolved to “Yoga Pants & Heels” and I started caring about likes and comments.
After months of very little engagement, it finally happened: I got an email announcing I had received a comment on my last post! Thrilled, I rushed to check it out. It said:
“Your blog is so boring, I bet your boyfriend is cheating on you.”
You guys – I wish I was kidding! But no, that’s what it said, and she wasn’t entirely wrong (about the boring part.)
Luckily, I’ve learned there are always hidden lessons in the moments that, at the time, feel terrible. Yes, my ego definitely took a hit that day, but I also started to understand something vitally important: whenever my writing became about achievement about someone else’s opinions and thoughts, it fell flat.
The very same thing is true about our lives. Whenever we make our choices based on external validation, achievement, or someone else’s definition of success, they will leave us unfulfilled, disappointed, hurt ego in hand. When we put the weight of others’ judgements and expectations on our art, our careers, our love, our path through life, it all falls flat. It’s boring. And it might mean your bf/gf is cheating on you.
Just kidding, but you get my point.
As a new season approaches and we start getting goal-giddy, I invite you to keep this in mind: whatever you choose to do, you must choose it and do it JUST FOR YOU. If it’s for anyone else or for any other reason besides that it feels true and beautiful and right to you, it will likely miss the mark and leave you empty, right back at square one.